Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Multi Level marketing - Con Con Con

As you would have guessed from the title, its a post about this huge sham that's going on MLM.

I was talking to my husband last night about this Multi-level marketing thing. This topic started because some MLM guy was consistently calling my husband on his phone. We had to threaten him of police complaint to get him STFU.

Like initially, a few people I personally know have fallen for this quick-buck crap. And never made profits but lost enough money over it.

Multi level marketing works like this, you buy this shit-load of crap giving a helluva money and try to sell it to whoever you can con and they buy shit load of crap and con someone and so on and so forth.

Its totally ridiculous, I will tell you how.

In Mumbai, there is this seminar that happens every Monday, where this suit clad men gather a few innocent stupid people and give a grand hare-brained scheme with very typical copyrighted dialogues.

I so wanted to pull a plug on at least one guy once, The scene goes like this.

This suit clad MLM guy rants a speech for 10 minutes "I am from IIM-A, I had a job in a very big multi-national company. I left my job and got into this and in 3 months I made more than I would make in 3 years. My at-home wife, is working from my home itself and makes almost 3-4 lacs in 3 weeks. Its very simple and easy. Anyone can do it. And this product has so many good features. Its a never-seen-before product. Its already selling all over the world. I and a few of my IIT, IIM friends are now bringing it into our country"


The MLM guy, takes water from a water bottle, pours it into a transparent glass, puts in 2 wires, positive and negative of a bulb and says "See the bulb didn't glow"
Then he takes a spoonful of some powder out of a "naturo" some jar and puts it in the same glass of water and again puts in the positive and negative wires and now the bulb glows. Now, this guy is like "If this powder can give so much energy to a bulb imagine what it would do to your body"
And people standing around him are in awe.
Im like duhh "Dude, get your head straight. Plain water isn't charged, even if you put salt the bulb will glow in any ways" 

The look on his face said, that he wanted to slap the shit out of me. And I walked off like a boss. *tch tch*

My husband shared his encounter with such, what can i say leeches.

My innocent beau, was eating alone in a restaurant, and this guy sits next to him and strikes a normal conversation. "Hi, I'm this, do u stay around here, oh, work might be hectic. We should get in touch, you can take down my number"
"Take down my number" here is where the victim gets caught.
My beau saved his number.
MLM guy "give me a missed call"

Exactly, after 2 weeks this MLM thing calls my beau and starts his typical dialogues "I am from IIT, My friends are from IIM, we have a start up and we are looking for highly intelligent investors blah blah"
My beau tried to avoid him like hell, but no, the MLM thind just doesnt give up.
Now MLM thing's name is stored as  "Chu**ya Do Not Pick"

Again my beau was in the same restaurant when another MLM thing came over and ranted the exact same, byhearted "IIT-IIM-Start up" dialogs. The MLM thing ranted for 15 minutes straight and my dude didn't open his mouth. then came the number exchange session, to this my beau says
"Sir, no offence meant, you seem to be a nice guy, but 2 weeks back a guy came over to me with this amazing MLM plan and I made a mistake of giving my number and that SOB has been pestering me like a crazy dog, you are a nice guy no doubt but I am sorry sir too many cons around" and wiped his hands and walked off. Like a true boss
(I went ROTFLMAO) at this.

Like seriously people, there is nothing called as quick-buck.
You have to work towards making money or inherit it.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Mumbai in my heart

It looks like i blogged eons back, my poor blog looks so deserted and lonely.
Well, sentiments apart, I really have been missing of the social network scene for about 70 odd days now.

No, I haven't taken any "no technology" oath, I just was caught up with a few major changes in my life.
The biggest change is shifting cities.

Now, the sentence "Mumbai is a city, Bombay is an emotion" makes perfect sense to me.
For me," Mumbai itself is an emotion and Bombay is a beautiful memory".

People who come from out do not like Mumbai because of the crowd and people to leave Mumbai for another city miss that crowd.

I miss crowded trains.
True that
I miss fast paced life
I miss that hub-a-dub at 6am on the streets
I miss open shops at 8.30pm.
I miss street fights and gaalis in Hindi and shivi's in Marathi
I miss my 8.12 (aat bara) local
I miss "Agla station dadar"
I miss the street food (Sandwich wala and his masala batata, chaat wala, extra masala poori, dabeli, Milkmaid gola, kulfi...i can just go on with the list)
I miss talking to strange women on train and not feeling strange about it

I just cant accept it when people call my city Bombay, I automatically end up correcting them that its "Mumbai"

Its awkward when I am referred to a "Girl from Bombay"
No people, I am a "Girl from Mumbai"

Its weird when I am referred to as a "North Indian"
Get some facts right people "I am from the Western part of India"

Its dumb when people ask "Do you speak Tamil at home or is it just Hindi (Indi as pronounced) or Marathi (Marathee as pronounced)"
Well, everyone in Mumbai speak their mother tongue at home.

It sounds weird to me when "Punjabi cuisine" is referred as 'North Indian"

Words fall short to describe what that city means to me now, tears roll down at times. Its, surely not a city, Its a deep emotion.
I am and I always will be a Mumbaikar at heart.

I miss home, I miss Mumbai